Total Kung Fu

This is for all of us who secretly think those Dance Dance Revolution style rhythm games look like fun but fear they'll threaten our sexuality. 

Total Kung Fu has the same frantic, spastic stepping and flailing as DDR... 



... only instead of dance moves, your movements are translated to vicious, bone-crunching kicks and punches.

We're talking lightning-fast blurred fists, '70s kung fu movie-style fighting where punching and blocking is done with the same desperate, heart-pounding frenzy it takes to keep up with the beat in the harder levels of DDR. You wouldn't even need a floor pad, just an extra Wiimote and nunchuck to strap to your ankles. 

Also: Online Multiplayer. Yes, it's tough to do for a rapid-fire twitch fighting game. But this is 2010, Nintendo. Figure it out.